So yesterday, in a bariatric support group on Facebook, a mother asked for opinions on her 12 year old daughter and weight loss surgery / dieting... as I continued to read comments and suggestions it honestly hurt my heart for these children and parents who are struggling with something I have experienced myself both as a child and as a parent!
I thought about my kids, my mother, my childhood, my family, and more than anything... my experiences as a "fat kid" and what my "fat kid" has overcome since my weight loss journey began. I figured it would be a good time to put this blog to use and actually take some time to sit down at my computer and write something that may help others.
My opinions and the information I plan to share in this post are based on one thing and one thing only.. my experience. I'm not claiming to be an expert by any means, but I think my knowledge may be pretty damn valuable to someone who needs some help in an area I have struggled with and continue to struggle with.
As a child I was fat. I was really fat.
I remember my mom blaming my grandmother for my weight problem, because she always fed me and gave me junk food. My grandmother passed away when I was in 2nd grade so from that point on, she wasn't feeding me anymore... but mom always found a way to blame her for it.
I had TERRIBLE eating habits and I loved food! I drank nothing but
soda and sugary drinks. I loved fried food, fast food, and buffets... I
ate everything and anything and I had no idea whether I was actually
hungry or not... I just wanted to eat!!! There was rarely a food I came across that I didn't like!
As a family we went to buffets a LOT. And man could I eat when we went to the buffet. I remember my mom used to make fun of me and say "it's all you can eat, not all you can carry!" because I'd get SO much food it would be PILED up on my plate when I came back to the table. I LOVED the buffet... there was so much food and I wanted to try all of it. I'd eat until I literally couldn't eat anymore and then I'd still manage to pig out at the dessert bar! I wouldn't just get one or two desserts... nope, I'd want to sample everything and fill a plate full of delicious fat filled sugary treats!
We ate out a lot. When my mom cooked she fried a lot of it. I remember lots of dinners were stuff like hamburger helper, scalloped potatoes, chili, Salisbury steaks, etc. When we had vegetables they were always canned veggies and when prepared they were doused in butter/margarine. I loved it all! (Well, except canned carrots... I hated cooked carrots and still do til this day).
We ordered pizza frequently... lots of pizza with lots of toppings... bread sticks and all the goodies that went along with it... and of course, pop!
We always had awesome snacks around the house... little debbies, chips, cookies, you name it! And if they were there... I ate them!
I'd sneak food... get caught... get made fun of and tormented by my mother about how much I eat.
I'd not only eat a lot, but I'd also eat fast... like my food was going to run away and my mother would make fun of me and fuss at me about it.
I remember going to my Aunt Sharon's house and being bribed to lose weight. A dollar for every pound I lost. God, those days were awful... but I smiled and promised to try to lose weight, and I'd deal with all the put downs and shitty things my mom would say about me and all the things "I" did wrong that made me fat.
As a kid I was pretty active... I loved riding my bike! I loved sticking my "ghetto blaster" in my basket and riding around my bike over and over and over listening to the Beastie Boys or Belinda Carslile on cassette. I loved our family trips to the amusement park or race tracks. I loved going to the roller skating rink on the weekend with my friends. I loved being outdoors just as much as I loved playing the Atari, Nintendo, or computer games we had readily available... anytime I wanted really, and as much as I wanted.
So... why was I fat? Was it my grandmother? Was it the fact that I loved food so much I couldn't stop eating? Was I fat because of how much I ate or what I ate?
The worst part, to me, is that I carried these bad habits over into adult hood and raised my kids the same way.
Now they're fat too.
But... it's never too late to change. It's NEVER too late to try.
I started my weight loss journey at the very end of 2014 for myself AND for my family.
What I have learned and what I've taught them has not erased the past mistakes and the poor choices and habits of over 35 years... but it's laid the foundation for a much much much healthier future.
My next post will explain the changes we've made as a family, not just the changes I had to endure for my health but what I have instilled in my 11 year old child's mind as well.
This post, however, is my plead to parents and adults with heavy children to realize that THEY are most likely the culprit when it comes to their kids' weight issues.
As many people suggested in the comments of the post I mentioned at the beginning... check your pantry, what are YOU feeding your child?
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